Well, yesterday, I did manage to get into a zen place and not have to worry to much about the anniversary. Today, I was not so lucky. I went on facebook (a mistake, I know). There was a message from my ex (and technical husband). It said, “Happy Anniversary, my darling wife.” I know he meant it with sincerity and probably has hope in his heart for us. For me, though, it was absolutely crushing. I laid down and cried for a few minutes, then I just attempted to sleep the day away. My son was in tears about missing his step-sister, not that he knows today is significant. My bestie brushed me off; I’m positive that she didn’t get why I wanted to not be alone today. In fact, other than my ex, I was the only one to remember today.
So here I sit broken-hearted, missing my friend and love. I wish that I could hold on to some kind of internal strength today. I think I just need to make it through the rest of the night and make use of the snow tomorrow. I think I’m going to bang off making detergent from my 2014 list. Only 5 hours to go. I know I’ll feel better tomorrow. He’ll have his miserable day tomorrow, because I won’t respond; I’ve blocked him on facebook. That’s all I’ve got.
PS. Should I have responded? All, I know is that I never want to see him again, even on facebook.